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What I am writing is about girls, but it concerns more with the boys.

So, if you are a boy and you are reading this then please be open-minded.

I know it’s a long read, but I hope this will help make at least some boys “Men of Substance”.

I am actually talking about the way the boys perceive girls. There is a problem in their way of thinking. Basically, this problem crops up with the ‘single’ ones. Single is defined here as not being in a committed relationship. Being single is the most perishable curse that boys feel today. I don’t know why? I am also single; I understand the ‘pain’ that single boys go through but I think it’s not a curse guys.

Now what does an unattached boy feel? He thinks that he is the “most-unlucky” person in this universe. Sometimes he looks at one of his “committed” friend’s and thinks that even this dumb and ugly fellow has got a girl and I am still single.

This type of thinking creates a problem in his mind, which I term as “Love Hallucination”. 

Let’s take an example-

There is a boy “XYZ” who is single. A girl “ABC” crosses the path of XYZ. Now as ABC passes by she gives a slight smile to XYZ. Now there could be many reasons behind this “smile”. May be XYZ is looking funny, or maybe she was not smiling at him, maybe she was smiling at some PQR behind XYZ, but XYZ misunderstood her.

Now what XYZ interprets? His mind says that “I think that girl loves me”.

Oh C’mon man! There could be various reasons, other than “love”. You could also say that she is smiling at you ‘coz she wants to be friend’s with you or in the best case she “likes” you. But no, boys directly choose the “love” option. “She is smiling at me, it means she ‘loves’ me.” And they also start giving other’s stupid reasons like, “She eats ‘golgappa’ from the same ‘golgappawala’ I eat, it means she ‘loves’ me. This is called “Love Hallucination”.

This problem can remain in their mind, but boys want to let it out. Now they believe they are in love with the girl (which obviously is not love). And they also want the girls to admit their love for them (which is impossible on earth). They start approaching girls at all times, they irritate them, annoy them. But boys, seriously, if a girl doesn’t like you, you can’t make her like you. If you personally don’t like “Karela” then nobody can make you to eat “Karela”. Isn’t it?

Now comes the biggest problem, under the misconception of love the boy proposes to the girl and she rejects him. “How can she reject me? I am the best man she could ever get.” No buddy, you are not a “man”. You are a baby who needs “polio drop” for his brain. If you can’t handle “rejection”, then you can’t survive in this world.

And here comes the shameless action. After getting rejected, the boy start’s to spread rumors about that girl. He calls the girl ‘characterless’. I mean how rejecting you, can make her characterless? That’s one depraved way of thinking.  The girl who you once thought you were in love with is now “characterless”. Can you prove this “Rejection-Character Theorem”?

Does it also mean if your sister rejects any random guy, then she is characterless too?

Now let’s come to another issue which is really a very-very big social problem- EVE-TEASING GIRL.

Some boys think that teasing a girl is machismo. These boys have no life; they just stand on the sidewalk or pathway and stalk girls passing by. And not only stalking, they move one step ahead and pass lewd comments. They refer to girls with various obscene names. They also refer to girls as an “ITEM”. I mean a girl is a living being, with millions of emotions and billions of feelings, and you are addressing her as an “ITEM”. She’s not a toy to play with.

Such men would get furious if their sisters are referred to as same but don’t think twice while insulting some other girl. And the ones who don’t have sisters do ask your mother/girlfriend/wife what she thinks of such behavior.

Some boys may be thinking that this article is not for them. I don’t do things like that. But my dear gentleman, you have a moral responsibility to stop your friends and other guys from doing this.

On stopping other boys the excuse they give to justify their action is that they blame the attire of the girls, their short dresses. I want to make one thing clear it’s not about short dresses; it’s about your “limited/chauvinistic thinking”. Have you thought about girls who are totally covered but are still eve-teased?

If you are reading this then please take a stand on this issue, at least at your level.

And don’t feel sad about being single. It’s not that bad. Making comments on girls and teasing them is not going to change your relationship status.

We usually talk about “WOMEN EMPOWERMENT”. The truth is that a safe society for girls can’t be developed just by empowering the girls. Only a slight change in thinking of men can do so much more easily.

So, change your thinking, be a gentleman, then there could be a chance for you to have a cup of coffee with ABC. Or, other than this, just do it for ensuring a better society for your own mother, sister or any other girl you love.

-Astitva Srivastava 

( (CSE) – 2nd Year)